heart disease

ok, it's been right about a month since the last entry. not too bad considering the months that passed prior to the last post.

not too many days ago, my husband and i were in the truck going somewhere when it seemed the Lord was speaking to me re heart disease.

now most of us (if not all) have prob heard of the dangers of heart disease and the consequences of such; but have we ever really considered the spiritual type of heart disease? i know i suffer with it, though i desire healing.

i'm not necessarily talking of spiritually fatal heart disease, which would mean that my heart was corrupted with sin which would result in eternal death; Jesus' sacrifice healed that part many, many years ago. but what about the clogged arteries, or the lack of exercise, or the lack of blood flow (his) pumping through me or the correct nutrition to keep it going?

i recently finished reading a book re a doctor who did heart transplants and a key verse was "...guard your heart for it is the wellspring of life" (prov 4:23)and that's what seemed to lead to this blog entry.

though i'm not a medical professional, i am a christian.

as noted earlier, it seems to me that i have some spiritual heart disease. i'm guilty of allowing other people's behavior (actions or lack thereof, attitudes, etc) affect my heart and thus my attitudes and actions. i guess you could say i've eaten the wrong diet. i need to focus on what God says about me, not how others relate or don't relate to me. feeding on the wrong diet seems to create areas of hardness in my heart. what should dictate my behavior in this life is the Holy Spirit of God. just as i'm not to be drunk with wine but be filled by the Spirit, so i should not be influenced by others behavior. THANK GOD he can truly change a heart of stone to a heart of flesh.

i also lack spiritual exercise. it's been way too long since i've kept up my studies and prayer times, as well as regular attendance in worship and fellowship as my daily way of life. without exercise it only seems to reason that we become weak. exercise is oftentimes hard, and i've never really gotten into it in the physical sense. spiritual exercise is also hard as the enemy (satan) throws all sorts of distractions into the mix as well as deceit; sometimes disagreements with others, emotions, illness, trouble with the car, or who knows what else. i heard a man speak on television the other night; [paraphrased in my own words: that when God has called you to a task, even though there are obstacles thrown in the way, be faithful to it unless He has told you not to do it, and if you're confused, go ahead with it unless it is contradictory to God's word]. how often i've given in because i'm too tired, too upset, too frustrated, or perhaps even confused (should we go here or there?), or a doctor appt comes up when i'm supposed to have my God appt time, etc. i have not been disciplined in my exercise.

as for clogged arteries? though God has done a wonderful work in teaching me about forgiveness and helping me to understand and apply it, i still suffer with anger and feelings of insignificance and loneliness that seem to build up "plaque" and not allow the spiritual truths to flow through me effortlessly. i know it's been said that Jesus is all we need but living in the earthly realm i still struggle. there's been a lot of different losses in my life over the last five years and the depression, though seeming to dissipate for a time, still rares its head way too often. i need a good diet of God's truths at regular intervals to offset this.

not sure if i really got all these thoughts out like i'd hoped. the thing is, heart disease can result in death and spiritual heart disease can cause us to die in another way. we die to joy and the abundant life that God has planned for us. God's word speaks that "Where there is no vision, the people perish:..."(prov 29:18b). the thing is, God is to be our vision, our hope, our healing, our everything...our wellspring.

"...the wellspring of life." i looked up some of the meanings: "source", "origin", "one that never ends"

you all have a great day and "guard your heart". i hope to be doing a better job with mine.